It had occurred to me that I have not been having my heart fully into this year.  Last year was an amazing year.  I have been stuck in the past and comparing this year to it.  I couldn't see how this year could be anything compared to it.  But I didn't like that I was feeling that way.  I wanted to have my all into this year.  The Lord wants me here for a reason and I was refusing to truly believe that.  I had been struggling with this for about the fist month of being here, then last Saturday the Lord really spoke to me and told me that our relationship is one that takes both people working at it.  He told me that if I wanted him to do something I would need to do something too, he wanted me to fast.  Now I have never really fasted before for longer than a day or so.  At first I was like " God are you sure about this."   And he was.  So this past week I fasted.  It was hard but I was able to get thru with the strength of the lord.  "I can do everything through him who gives me strength"- Phil. 4:13   This week I was able to feel closer to Christ and really felt a change of heart.  I really feel like the Lord changed my heart.  I am now excited to get more participants out on the field and really feel like I am doing something here to change the world. I don't have to be in Africa to help those there.  I can help by encouraging and praying for those on the field and those that will go out this next year.  I get to help to empower and get those who go out in January, May, June, July and September excited and ready to go out and change lives.  How exciting is it that I get to do that.  I mean I get to tell these future teams how great this time will be for them.  How life changing.  I get to share with them about my year in Africa to them to get them excited about their trip.  I am getting excited about that even as I write this.  I just have to let the Lord use me to my fullest wherever that is.  Whether in Africa or here in Gainesville.   So from this moment on I am going to be putting my heart 100% into this year and can't wait to help lives change from the office.